Friday, 26 August 2011

Is the traditional gift for a fifth wedding anniversary honesty?

Sparky tells me a story about when his mother and father were first married his mother was a terrible cook, (and I can get away with saying it because she admits it herself). One night, she made Bread and Butter pudding and his father complimented her on it, saying how much he enjoyed it. From then on, for many years apparently, Sparky's mum made bread and butter pudding for her husband because she thought he loved it. He hated it with a passion! He finally summoned up the courage to tell her after many years because he finally couldn't swallow another spoonful. They remained happily married and he no longer had to be tortured eating food he despised.

Which brings me to the core of today's post. Sparky first made me "chicken surprise" when we were courting, many moons ago. I hated it, but I was so in love with this man (still am) that I couldn't bare to tell him how much I thought it tasted like old cheese boiled in a used sock. When his core ingredient of 1 tin of Cream of chicken soup went out of production, I breathed a huge sigh of relief, and my taste buds did a little dance of excitement. I kept his recipe in our recipe folder, more out of sentimentality and love than for any other reason. Until this week. When Sparky showed me that his friend has found a suitable replacement for the cream of chicken soup (apparently his friends like eating cheesy sock as well), he started writing a shopping list of ingredients so we can make it this weekend.

So my question is this, at what point in the relationship is it fair to truly open up to your life partner? To say that his "chicken surprise" is more like "chicken disappointment". To ask him to stop making the joke that the "surprise" is that he doesn't wash his hands, followed by uncontrolled laughter, only from him, EVERYTIME! Sparky and I have been married to each other for 5 years this month, is the traditional gift for a fifth wedding anniversary honesty?

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